Category Archives: civil rights

Marriage Equality: Facts v Lies

Posted on April 15, 2009 | 1 comment

Pat GozembaIf you spend time reading religious objections to marriage equality, watching ads like the National Organization for Marriage blockbuster “The Gathering Storm,” or tuning in to Brian Camenker’s MassResistance blather, then you might enjoy a straightforward rebuttal to the anti-equality messaging.

 

The same old objections to marriage equality are recycled through all the media and the more often we can correct the lies, the better it will be for civil discourse to begin. 

Check out the “facts” from WakingUpNow.com. No laughs. Just facts.

 

 


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Posted in civil rights, marriage equality

Hawaii’s community leaders speak up for civil unions

Posted on March 19, 2009 | 2 comments

With the legislative session half over, Hawaii’s civil unions bill, HB444 HD1, is still stuck in the Senate Judiciary Commitee, where a 3-3 split vote prevented the bill from moving to the floor. All that is needed is for 9 of the 25 sentators to vote to pull the bill from committee, but the pressure from the opposition seems to be weakening support. A move toward “compromise” has angered supporters, who believe that now is the time to grant same-sex couples all the rights, benefits and responsibilities afforded heterosexual spouses.

To reinforce the message that people across the islands believe in equality, Unite Here Local 5 hosted a press conference on March 18 showcasing community leaders in favor of civil unions. The group of leaders, which included native Hawaiians, civil rights advocates from the Japanese, Filipino, African-American communities, and labor leaders, issued the following joint statement:

Dear Senators:

In 1998, Hawai‘i voted to grant our state legislators “the power to reserve marriage to opposite sex couples.” However, this did not obviate the Legislature’s obligation under the constitution to provide equal protection to all of Hawai‘i’s citizens.

Now, more than a decade later, you have before you an historic opportunity to extend equality to same-sex couples and their families. HB 444 HD1 has already passed the House with overwhelming support. It is now up to you.

As leaders of diverse communities across the islands, we call on you to bring the Civil Unions bill to the floor for passage. We believe:

• This is a civil rights issue. Married couples in Hawai‘i, and their children, have access to an extensive package of rights, benefits, and responsibilities. Same-sex couples have very limited access to these same rights and benefits, though they fully participate in our communities, pay taxes, support their children, care for their elders and carry out all the same obligations as other families in our communities. Civil unions would provide equality under State law, as guaranteed by the Hawai‘i State Constitution.

• This is an issue of economic justice. In these times of extreme economic vulnerability for all of Hawai‘i’s families, civil unions would provide greater economic stability for families currently excluded from the State’s marriage laws. As an example, same-sex couples are unable to benefit from joint tax filings and must spend hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars on legal documents, only to obtain a small fraction of the protections afforded to married couples. Civil unions would provide equal and fair treatment for all of Hawai‘i’s families.

• This is about ‘ohana. Across our islands, our most important deeply held values are about ‘ohana and malama, supporting and caring for our families and communities. We have always accepted and embraced all members of our families, from keiki to kupuna, regardless of their sexual orientation or gender expression. We must stop the discrimination and instead offer respect, love, and equality under the law.

We call on you to uphold Hawai‘i’s constitution, to support equality and economic justice, and to strengthen all of Hawai‘i’s ‘ohana by enacting civil union legislation now.

Sincerely,

Aloha,

Dr. Amy Agbayani, Co-Chair, Friends of Civil Rights and Filipinos for Affirmative Action
Shawn Benton, President, Japanese American Citizens League – Honolulu Chapter
Alphonso Braggs, President, Honolulu – Hawai‘i NAACP
Puanani Burgess, Principle, One Peace-At-A-Time
Eric Gill, Financial Secretary-Treasurer, UNITE HERE Local 5
Debi Hartmann, Former Chair, Hawai‘i State Board of Education
Lynette Hi‘ilani Cruz, Professor of Anthropology; President, Ka Lei Maile Ali‘i Hawaiian Civic Club
Faye Kennedy, Co-Chair, Hawai‘i Friends of Civil Rights
Poka Laenui, Director, Institute for the Advancement of Hawaiian Affairs
Brien Matson, President, Musicians’ Association of Hawai‘i, Local 677
James Nakapa‘ahu, Representative, Hui o Na Ike, alternative media for alternative voices
Wayne Kaho‘onei Panoke, Executive Director, ‘Ilio‘ulaokalani Coalition
Vicky Holt Takamine, Executive Director, PA‘I Foundation
Allicyn Tasaka & Debbie Shimizu, Co-Chairs, Hawai‘i State Democratic Women’s Caucus

 

 

 

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Posted in civil rights, civil unions, Hawai'i

Joke: Marriage Equality Fails in Massachusetts

Posted on March 12, 2009 | 1 comment

Pat Gozemba

If one did nothing but read even the half-baked right-wing screeds about the effects of same-sex marriage, life could be pretty scary. Take for example Brian Camenker’s insane piece “The Effects of Same-Sex Marriage on Massachusetts” and put it in the hands of the Hawaii Family Forum and these folks: Parents for Righteousness Corporation, Ka’Ala View Baptise Chapel, and Jesus Christ Gathering His People Ministry. (No, I did not make up those names.) So is Hawaii scared?

As the fundamentalist churches (evangelical, Catholic, and Mormon)  in Hawaii struggle to defeat HB 444 Civil Unions, they are relying on Camenker’s arguments about Massachusetts. Ethan Jacobs in “MassResistance Goes Hawaiian” details the ways in which Dennis Arakaki the Executive Director of Hawaii Family Forum denies that they have pushed Camenker’s “research.” All one has to do is check out the Hawaii Family Forum site and there is Camenker’s insanity spun out once again.

Parents for Righteousness Corporation, Ka’Ala View Baptise Chapel, and Jesus Christ Gathering His People Ministry sent “The Effects of Same-Sex Marriage” to every Hawaii senator. I follow that act with my own memo to the senators that I hand-delievered with Jo-Ann Adams, Co-Chair of the LGBT Caucus of the Democratic Party of Hawaii. Here’s my response to Camenker that I crafted with the assistance of research by Stewart Landers, DPH, and GLAD.

To all Hawaii Senators
As a part-time resident of Hawaii and permanent resident of Massachusetts, as well as scholar and writer on issues of concern to the LGBT community, I follow Camenker’s work. Note that the Southern Poverty Law Center, a watchdog of hate groups in the US, has named MassResistance an Anti-Gay Hate Group for the second year in a row.

In Massachusetts, Brian Camenker’s work is generally regarded as not worth addressing seriously because it is so fraught with purposeful distortions. But given its emergence in Hawai’i at this critical moment of the consideration of HB 444 HD 1 and its posting on the Hawaii Family Forum website, I want to give you a sense of the egregiousness of some of Camenker’s misinformation. To that end, in contrast and as an example, I detail the truth of five “mistruths” in “The Effects of Same-Sex Marriage in Massachusetts” by Camenker.

I call your attention in particular to Mistruth #2 that refers to Courting Equality, a book my spouse, Karen Kahn, and I co-authored. I know first-hand the distortion of reality regarding our book. And on a final note, I would like to say that our experience in Massachusetts with same-sex marriage has been very positive—and there is not a shred of evidence to suggest otherwise.

MISTRUTH  #1
In 2006 the Parkers and Wirthlins filed a federal civil rights lawsuit to force the schools to notify parents and allow them to opt-out their elementary-school children when homosexual-related subjects were taught.  The federal judges dismissed the case. The judges ruled that because same-sex marriage is legal in Massachusetts, the school actually had a duty to normalize homosexual relationships to children, and that schools have no obligation to notify parents or let them opt-out their children! Acceptance of homosexuality had become a matter of good citizenship!

TRUTH: This is a completely inaccurate statement about the First Circuit’s ruling in the Parker v. Hurley case.  The Court did not mandate the teaching of any subject or course material, nor did it say that the school had any duty to teach about marriage or any other subject.  Rather, in response to the claims by the Wirthlins and the Parkers that their free exercise rights had been violated, the Court found that “the mere fact that a child is exposed on occasion in public school to a concept offensive to a parent’s religious belief does not inhibit the parent from instructing the child differently.”  Overall, the decision found that including a few books with depictions of same-sex couples in the curriculum did not violate the constitutional rights of students or parents – NOT that those books must be included or taught. (Source: Nima Eshgsi, Esq. of Gay, Lesbian, Advocates and Defenders http://www.GLAD.org)

MISTRUTH # 2
Libraries have also radically changed.  School libraries across the state, from elementary school to high school, now have shelves of books to normalize homosexual behavior and the lifestyle in the minds of kids, some of them quite explicit and even pornographic.
Parents’ complaints are ignored or met with hostility. Over the past year, homosexual groups have been using taxpayer money to distribute a large, slick hardcover book celebrating homosexual marriage titled “Courting Equality” into every school library in the state.
TRUTH: On Sept. 27, 2007, Camenker reported to his own listserv that Chip McLaughlin and Keith Maynard donated private funds to PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) for distribution of Courting Equality (Beacon Press, 2007) to Gay/Straight
Alliances (GSA) in MA public high schools and to the libraries of high schools that do not have GSAs. A year later, he “reports” that taxpayer money was used and that the book is in every school not just high schools.  Courting Equality tells the story of how LGBT people and their allies across the state used the democratic political process to expand civil rights for LGBT people. The donors thought this book would inspire teenagers to become active participants in democracy. They “offered” the book as a gift, and no high school GSA or library was forced to accept it.

MISTRUTH # 3
Since homosexual marriage became “legal” the rates of HIV / AIDS have gone up considerably in Massachusetts. This year public funding to deal with HIV/AIDS has risen by $500,000.
TRUTH: Rates of HIV/AIDS have not gone up considerably since same-sex marriage became legal. In fact, the number of new HIV cases has dropped by 25 percent over the past five years, the decrease accelerating since the implementation of same-sex marriage.
Additional funding was available at the beginning of FY09 to address the disparate impact of HIV/AIDS in communities of color. However, since then, given current budget crises, funding for HIV/AIDS has declined by $1.75M. (Source: Kevin Cranston, Director, Bureau of Infectious Disease, Massachusetts Department of Public Health).

MISTRUTH # 4
Given the extreme dysfunctional nature of homosexual relationships, the Massachusetts Legislature has felt the need to spend more money every year to deal with skyrocketing homosexual domestic violence. This year $350,000 was budgeted, up $100,000 from last year.

TRUTH: Domestic violence occurs among people in same-sex relationships at similar rates to people in heterosexual relationships. However, many domestic violence programs are unable to work effectively with same-sex victims of domestic violence because
they lack adequate training—thus, the state’s interest in providing funding. The legalizing of same-sex marriage has had no detectable effect on rates of same-sex domestic violence. (Source: Carlene Pavlos, Director, Division of Violence and Injury Prevention, Massachusetts Department of Public Health.)

MISTRUTH # 5
Since homosexual relationships are now officially “normal”, the Legislature now gives enormous tax money to homosexual activist groups. In particular, the Massachusetts Commission on Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender Youth is made up of the most
radical and militant homosexual groups which target children in the schools. This year they are getting $700,000 of taxpayer money to go into the public schools.

TRUTH: Massachusetts was one of the first states to support efforts to combat homophobia by supporting programs such as Gay-Straight Alliances and Safe Spaces for GLBT Youth. These programs, which began in the early 1990s long before same-sex marriage became legal, provide respite and support for youth who may or may not be gay, but who may be subject to slurs and hate speech from their peers or sometimes hateful adults. The legalization of same-sex marriage has had no effect on the level of funding
for these programs, though recent budget cuts have reduced this year’s appropriation to $550,000. (Source: Stewart Landers, Senior Program Director, Massachusetts Department of Public Health)

END

So is Hawaii scared? Only the religious bigots are scared. Scared that their propaganda from Camenker is not working and the newly formed alliance of Native Hawaiians, labor, religious groups, the ACLU and over 80 other organizations is impressing theHawaii Senate to follow the lead of the Hawaii House and vote for civil unions.

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Posted in civil rights, civil unions, Hawai'i, MA

Married in Massachusetts… Not in Hawaii …

Posted on March 5, 2009 | Leave a comment

Kath Sands and Linda Krieger

Kath Sands, former professor of religion at UMass-Boston, and her partner Linda Krieger, an attorney, have a marriage license in Massachusetts. But last year, they moved to Honolulu, where they both teach at the university–Kath in American Studies, and Linda at the Richardson School of Law. Linda grew up in Hawaii, and so it was a homecoming of sorts. But here in Hawaii, their marriage isn’t recognized. Like us, they have joined the struggle to pass a civil unions bill this legislative session.

This week’s Honolulu Weekly, features Kath and Linda in an extraodinarily moving story by the paper’s editor Ragnar Carlson. There haven’t been many stories that cover the challenges for married Massachusetts couples who leave our state–and with few exceptions–have to leave the legal recognition of their relationships behind as well. As Carlson says, “For Kreiger and Sands, who had preiously enjoyed equal status under the law, the transition was rough.” Read the full story.

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Posted in civil rights, civil unions, DOMA, family rights, Gays and Religion, Hawai'i, lgbt family, marriage equality, Massachusetts, religion

GLAD Challenges DOMA

Posted on March 5, 2009 | Leave a comment

On March 3, 2009, GLAD, with Mary Bonauto acting as lead attorney, opened the first salvo in the battle to overturn the federal Defense of Marriage Act. In particular, GLAD is challenging Section 3 of the law, which denies federal benefits to married same-sex couples. Here’s what The Progress Report, from the Center for America Progress, had to say:

 LAWSUIT TO OVERTURN DOMA: During the campaign, Obama promised to repeal DOMA, noting that “federal law should not discriminate in any way against gay and lesbian couples, which is precisely what DOMA does.” Today, Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders (GLAD) filed the first concerted, multi-plaintiff legal challenge to Section 3 of DOMA. GLAD is representing a group of gay plaintiffs who have been harmed by the federal refusal to recognize their marital rights. Under Section 3, legally married same-sex couples are excluded from any federal law or program that benefits other married individuals. The consequence of Section 3 is that gays and lesbians have been denied spousal protections in Social Security, federal income tax, federal employees’ and retirees’ benefits, and in the issuance of passports. In fact, according to a forthcoming Center for American Progress study by Ben Furnas and Josh Rosenthal, the average same-sex couple “will be denied over $8,000 a year in Social Security survivor benefits upon the death of the higher-earning spouse after retirement.” In Gill et al. v. Office of Personnel Management — filed in federal District Court in Boston — GLAD is arguing that Section 3 is unconstitutional because it violates the federal constitutional guarantee of equal protection and that it is “an unprecedented intrusion by the federal government into marriage law.” “I think one way of looking at it is it’s about change and accepting diversity, and I believe that I’m no different than anybody else,” one plaintiff in the case explained. “I should get the same benefits as any other spouse of a federal employee for 27 years. I think our relationship may look different but it’s ultimately the same.” GLAD believes the suit “may ultimately be decided by the U.S. Supreme Court, which would mark the first time the nation’s highest court heard a major DOMA challenge.”

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Posted in civil rights, DOMA, gay marriage, GLAD, lgbt family, marriage equality, Mary Bonauto, Massachusetts

A Native Hawaiian for Civil Unions

Posted on February 26, 2009 | 4 comments

Patricia A. Gozemba

Brad Ka’iwi Lum became the first Native Hawaiian chanter and kumu hula (teacher of hula) to speak out in favor of HB 444 for Civil Unions at a hearing of the Hawaii Senate Judiciary Committee on February 24th. In coming out as a gay man he broke a long silence in his own life and among kumu hula.

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Brad Ka’iwi Lum
Lum has emerged as a force in the civil unions struggle. He is organizing a Candlelight Vigil against discrimination and inequality at the Hawaii State capitol on Saturday, March 7 at 6 pm.Brad’s Testimony

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Aloha Chair Taniguchi, Vice Chair Takamine and members of the committee. My name is Bradford Ka’iwi Tin Cheong Lum. I’m a Native Hawaiian Studies Teacher, Kumu Hula of Halau Hula ‘O Ka’iwi, Chanter, Historian, and Teacher of Native Hawaiian Culture. I want to take this time to thank you for giving me the opportunity to testify in strong support of HB444 HD1, the Hawaii Civil Unions Bill.

I would like to tell you my personal story of defeat and triumph as a gay Native Hawaiian, who has chosen to come out and fight for my rights under the law of the Constitution of the State of Hawaii. I was born and raised in the McCully neighborhood of Honolulu. My father was Chinese; my mother, Native Hawaiian , Irish, Dutch, English, and German.

Local music and culture were important to our family, but in 1982 I decided to leave Hawaii for San Francisco, California, to pursue a life where I could be open about who I was. I lived in San Francisco for the next 12 years. I had a secure job with a good income, and I built a network of friends and support that became my ohana.

In 1995 my father asked me to come home to take care of him and my mother. My father had diabetes, gout, high blood pressure, and an aneurism in his stomach, and my mother had just been diagnosed with breast cancer. It was a hard decision to leave San Francisco, where I had built a life and a community. I really did not want to come home, but no one in the family was taking care of my parents and I felt it was my sincere duty to do this.

I returned home and went to work taking care of my mother and father. I took them to doctors and made sure they were well cared for. Because I knew they did not accept my lifestyle, I did not have a social life. I wanted to be a good son and tried my best to build trust, compassion, and love with my parents. But at the same time, I could not be the person I really wanted to be and could not have a relationship with a partner as an adult should have.

My father passed away on December 4, 1996, and my mother passed away on March 1, 2008. I did everything that I could to make sure that my parents where well taken care of and to fulfill their every wish.  But within me, there was a wounding, crippling, alienating, painful battle. In consideration of my parents, I could not be the person I am today: a prophetic leader of liberation, service, and body and spirit integration. Today I am a mentor, but I am exiled by my own family because I have made a decision to love another man and develop a deeper meaning of kinship so I can be happy and content for the rest of my life.

Many people have thanked me for changing my life for the better, for inspiring them to change their lives as well. As soon as my mother passed away, I felt I could live consciously and responsibly. I have decided to be vibrant and alive, to fully embrace my destiny, to be mindful of every moment, every encounter no matter how seemingly insignificant, and to have the potential for radical transformation of myself and my partner or even of a whole civilization.

I now consider myself as a pioneer of civil union rights for Native Hawaiians because most Hawaiians consider coming out shameful. We keep our sexual orientation a secret from the outside world, but I believe that such actions inhibit our ability to grow and have a sense of freedom. Holding this secret blocks our ability to become liberators and life-giving contributors to our island life style and to honor our contributions—big or small—to our community. When nongay people oppress us or label us, it challenges me to liberate myself: to teach love and commitment to one another, to embrace tolerance, and to claim love without the support of a dominant culture. And it teaches me not to discriminate against others, no matter their personal choices or beliefs.

As a pioneer, I am a trailblazer for others to follow. In our day-to-day struggles to survive I have become a leader not only for Native Hawaiian rights but of all people in Hawaii. I know for a fact that in coming out and becoming a model for others, I have bettered my own life and made it possible for me to contribute something important to our island lifestyle. HB 444 HD1 takes me out of the dark past that I have endured and gives me courage. It gives back to all of us the extraordinary possibilities and outrageous adventures that await if we uncross our fingers and take a deep breath and embrace our destiny to be the best we can be.

Civil Unions should be part of our society, because this change in law tells those of us who love people of the same-sex that we are part of the definition of “Ohana,” family. It’s hard for us as island people to talk about our sexuality and to support such a measure; for many of us, it is hard to come out to our family and communities. But our strength as island people is that we have “Hanohano,” tolerance, “Ha’aheo” pride, and we have “Aloha,” love. We must not discount where we come from and our Native Hawaiian roots. As a small island community, let us not ostracize people who are different. Civil Unions are about “Kuleana,” responsibility, and “Malama,” taking care of each other and, most importantly, “Ho’omalu,” protecting the good for all people in Hawaii.

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Posted in civil rights, civil unions, Hawai'i

Yes We Can

Posted on November 13, 2008 | Leave a comment

Last week, America voted for hope, not fear. For peace, not war. For love, not hatred. The election of Barack Obama represents what is best in the American spirit—fairness, equality, respect for hardworking people, a belief in a better tomorrow. It has been a long time coming. As Obama has said again and again over the last 21 months, America is a nation defined by its continued desire to form “a more perfect union.”

Unfortunately, for the LGBT community, voters who went to the polls in record numbers on Tuesday, voted their fears on the issues that matter to us most—respect for our families. We lost votes on marriage equality in three states: California, Florida and Arizona. And in Arkansas, voters banned unmarried couples from serving as foster or adoptive parents. This measure, clearly aimed at gay families, is perhaps the most damaging of this year’s initiatives in that it so blatantly carries the message that gay people are harmful to children.

Continue reading at Beacon Broadside.

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Posted in 2008 election, Arizona, Arkansas, california, civil rights, Connecticut, Florida, gay marriage, lgbt family, marriage equality, Massachusetts, Proposition 8

Courting Equality video promotes marriage equality

Posted on September 27, 2008 | 6 comments

Thanks to our good friends at Two Rivers Circle Productions and Aboriginal Lens, the story of LGBT people winning marriage equality is now available in a 5-minute documentary video. Using the photos from our book, the filmmakers created a video that will warm your heart—and hopefully move the hearts and minds of voters on November 4. California film producer Karen Rudolph has already been giving the video to local activists fighting Proposition 8, the California ballot question that would eliminate the right of same-sex couoples to marry in that state. Please send the video link to your friends, family, and contacts in California, Arizona, and Florida, and encourage them to share it with those who don’t yet understand the importance of this civil rights issue. The photographs of families sharing their love–and fighting for their rights can’t help but move people along. As Ellen DeGeneres explained recently to John McCain, we just want to celebrate our love the same way that everyone else does!

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Posted in Arizona, california, civil rights, Florida, gay marriage, marriage equality, Massachusetts

Blacks Lead Repeal of MA 1913 Law

Posted on July 22, 2008 | Leave a comment


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Rep. Byron Rushing (D-Boston) first alerted me that the 1913 law prohibiting out-of-state gay and lesbian couples from getting married in Massachusetts would soon be history. Rushing the great African American leader of all civil rights causes in our state was out in front of even the gay movement in announcing impending justice.

Just as the Peabody Essex Museum June 26th panel on same-sex marriage was about to close, Rushing pleaded for one more word. He urged members of the audience to call their legislators and ask them to support the repeal of the outdated racist law that had its origins in preventing out of state inter-racial couples from coming to the Bay State to marry. “Mark my words, we can do away with that law before the end of this legislative session. Call your legislators.”

As the panelist sitting closest to him, I blurted out, “Really?” He smiled.

Sixteen days later, it fell to the lone Black member of the Senate, Sen. Diane Wilkerson (D-Boston), to lead that body in taking the first step to repeal the law. With a unanimous voice vote on July 12, 2008, the Senate began the process of dismantling the racist law. Wilkerson told The Boston Globe that the law’s racial history makes her proud to back the repeal. “This is one of the most pernicious statutes on our books. This bill puts the final nail in the coffin of those dark days.”

A skilled orator, Wilkerson, during the 2004 Massachusetts constitutional convention debates over whether the legislature should undo the Goodridge decision, gave one of the most searing rebukes to those legislators wavering on the issue of equality. Recalling her upbringing in Arkansas during Jim Crow, she declared, “I know first hand that world of almost being equal, I could not in good conscience ever vote to send anyone to that place from where my family fled.”

If history is prologue, it will probably fall to Rushing to steer the bill through the Massachusetts House. The cause of justice could not be in better hands.

The truly “final nail in the coffin of those dark days,” will be the signature of African American Governor Deval Patrick on the repeal.

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Posted in 1913 Law, Arkansas, civil rights, Uncategorized

More Wedded Bliss

Posted on July 6, 2008 | Leave a comment

Brian Jewell is right when he notes in his Bay Windows article, The bliss off, the Peabody Essex Museum “Wedded Bliss” exhibit doesn’t explicitly address same-sex marriage. Nonetheless, it does an exceptional job of including art that both celebrates and critiques this central social institution. One of my favorites is a piece by Robert Boyd called “Cake Cutter,” in which a large knife is wielded to hack apart bride and groom wedding toppers. With the white bride and groom lying lifeless by the wedding cake, viewers are invited to think about all those who are excluded from the happy white wedding images that are so common in our culture. That made me think about what it meant to have been newly invited to the wedding party. What has changed for our community in Massachusetts–and now in California? Here’s a little of what I said at the museum on June 26:

Whether we are conformists or rebels, we cannot escape the importance of marriage to our society.  Thus it should be no surprise that gay men and lesbians have finally forced open that once tightly closed door. Being denied the social legitimacy and material benefits of marriage hurt—it hurt our self-esteem, it subjected us to psychological and sometimes physical violence, it threatened our relationships to partners and children. Marriage is no small matter.  

In Massachusetts, after four years of same-sex marriage, we can see the results of broadening the definition of marriage. Same-sex couples and their children have far more legitimacy as “families,” accepted by their communities (whether neighbors, school teachers, hospital personnel, car mechanics, or city clerks) in ways that gay and lesbian people in other parts of the country can hardly imagine. As our friend Steven Galante explained so eloquently in our book Courting Equality, “When marriage was made legal, it relieved people of their moral struggle with this particular issue. It allowed them to follow their hearts, their best instincts, and embrace our family.”

That embrace has been very important to LGBT families. But it is also important to remember, that as we move from the margin to the center, we can wrap ourselves in the romanticized commercialism of the white wedding industry or we can unpack the contradictions as many of the artists do in the Wedded Bliss exhibit.

Karen Kahn
July 6, 2008 

The bliss off
Brian Jewell
arts writer
Wednesday Jul 2, 2008

Sandy Skoglund’s faintly ominous
Sandy Skoglund’s faintly ominous
“The Wedding” provoked much discussion.   

While enjoying the beautiful Wedded Bliss exhibit at The Peabody Essex Museum, it is hard not to notice that something is missing. A survey of weddings as artistic inspiration, the exhibit gathers together both art inspired by marriage and objects associated with marriage (such as American wedding dresses and Japanese furoshiki). As the Museum’s Education Director, Peggy Fogelman, explained at a panel discussion last week, the exhibition explores courtship and weddings “across cultures, across centuries, and across lifestyles.”Yet same-sex relationships and marriage equality are all but ignored. Sharp-eyed viewers will spot a few gay couples in a video montage of wedding imagery, and a copy of Courting Equality, a chronicle of the journey to the country’s first same-sex marriages, on a table with other books about marriage. The biggest innovation in marriage since at least The Divorce Act of 1857 is given less attention than a handful of contemporary critiques of heterosexual marriage, and a couple of humorous nods to divorce. It’s a strange omission for an exhibit whose breadth reminds viewers that marriage rituals and traditions are constantly evolving. Never mind the fact that the country’s first same-sex civil marriages took place right here in Massachusetts.On June 26, the Peabody Essex addressed this omission with a screening of the film The Gay Marriage Thing and a panel discussion on same-sex marriage. Read the rest of this article.

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Posted in civil rights, gay marriage, lgbt family, MA, marriage equality, Massachusetts, Uncategorized